06 October 2005

American High Holy Days - Where Will You Be?

Now that we've talked to all our parents, I can post about the upcoming holidays. This will be the first set of American High Holy Days that we won't see our families at all.

What delights me:
I will not be eating turkey
I will not be decorating a tree or listening to bad christmas music
not buying crap
not wrapping crap
not driving between topeka, lawrence, kansas city, columbia, and st. louis
berkeley holidays weather

What deflates me:
no midnight mass with sisters
no christmas wine and meal with dad and s
no red-headed beautiful nephew running and laughing and grinning at me
not being there when the surprise orange gift is opened by dad
no rolling around at home feeling fat and going to movies with sisters and brothers

let's review:
what I will miss: the people
what I won't miss: everything else

In making my mental list, I remembered that the people aren't going anywhere. My parents are coming in November, my sister probably in December, and Matt's parents will probably come in the next few months, too. I get to go home for the baptism in November and see more family. These times are my new High Holy Days.

Through this and many other recent experiences, I am becoming a more relationship-oriented person, a people person. The old calendar-obsessive, anally-punctual, over-prepared, highlighter-wielding me is falling away, and as I shed the layers I am getting to know my real self. Shoot, today the lady at the Visitor's Center was 15 minutes late getting back from lunch, couldn't find her key for another five, and I was just happy to have the chance to talk to her. Sometimes I don't even recognize myself for my sickeningly good attitude. I would have hated me a few months ago. I would have been one of those west coast types who goes with the flow, isn't in too big a hurry, rolls with the punches. I can spot 'em a mile away. California is doing me good.

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